This year at Thanksgiving..

This year at Thanksgiving I hope and wish...
1. That my uncle doesn't make one of his "famous" potatoe salad sandwiches..That shit is just nasty to look at.
2. That Africans dont end up arguing over the last plate of chitterlings...Have some fuken dignity they're pig intestines Damnit !!
3. That the aunties dont get too drunk off of that "yak" ...talking about how much they miss the deceased frome years back...then talking about how much they hated their asses when they were alive !
4. That my cousins dont show up just to fix a plate and leave...that is some disrespectful shit..sit your asses down and eat with the family.
5. That my Uncle (again) dosen't knock over the women and children in order to get the first (3) plates...greedy nucca !
6. That the annual "Thanksgiving Day Spades Fight" doesn't break out...that gets ugly.. Granny cant fight like she used to..and cuss fights stops being interesting after a while. This also goes for Dominoes, Checkers, Chess, Playstation, Pictionary, or whatever else the family chooses to partake in.
7. That people realize that is doesn't matter who washed dishes last year, the point is that the shit needs to be done, wash your own damn dishes...that's what I do..besides I helped wash last year. =-)
8. That the family actually stop to give "thanks" this year..ungrateful ass ingrates, nothing is promised to us, stop and realize that.
9. And more than anything I wish that I could be there with you guys (my family & friends)...with that being said.. Why can't ya'll come visit me sometimes ?? DAYUM !!

Happy Thanksgiving... 1

I Finally Figured It Out....(I think)

After all of these years... I have been hearing my family talk about how my sorry ass grandfather has a mistress and how wrong that is and how strong and enduring my grandmother is for staying with her man inspite of. I had formed my opinion of my grandfather long ago when he stopped speaking to me because I started dating his mistresses niece and ended up being on his turf alot (I think he did a cartwell when we broke up)...Nevertheless I never stopped to think that maybe he has a reason to do what he does. And after years of debate the jury is in !! Turns out the negro has had a reason all along. During a recent visit to my country home I ran into an older lady that claimed she recognized me and that she was my Aunt, I told her I was positive that I didnt know her and then I told her who my dad and grand-parents were....she proceeds to tell me that she knows what they tell me but do I want to hear the truth...I'm like WTF (cue dramatic music)... She tells me that my grand mother had an affair years ago with her brother and from that fling my dad was conceived (I always thought my dad didnt look like his dad but what the hell I dont look like my dad.. big deal). Then this woman tells me to question my youngest aunt about who HER father is....at this point I am about ready to dismiss this old broad and tell her to get out of my bidness, but 1 has to respect his elders. I call my aunt and tell her about the event that popped off and she tells me (shortned version) that out of 6 kids only 2 belong to the man that I call "grandfather" (more dramatic music)....I can see how over the years an affair may pop off but GOTDAMN how you go and have 4 kids by 3 other Africans and expect to keep a faithful husband ?? So now I see why my Grandma dont say shit when someone on the usher board tells her that they saw Mista (my granfather) and Ceily (his mistress) together at the grocery store, Hell I guess after all of these years He just dosen't give a Monkey's Ass what people say, shit look at what he's done over the years. Raise 4 kids that are the products of infidelity, and attempt to show some signs of a decent marriage, I applaud him for that. But my question is WHY STAY TOGETHER !! Finally I figured out why my grandma dont say shit, 'cause she can't........ I need to ask my Mom why dont I look like my Dad (What do ya'll think)
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(I also need to ask Ceily's niece why she broke it off with me. I'd bet my playa hating ass grndfather had something to do with that...I'm still trying to figure all of this shit out)

Over the Years

I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.
I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just assholes.
I've learned that it takes years to build trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.
I've learned that you can get by on charm for about 15 minutes. After that, you'd better have a big cock or huge boobs.
I've learned that you can keep vomitting long after you think you're finished.
I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities.
I've learned that OJ did it.....as well as Micheal Jackson, P Diddy, and Ray Lewis.
I've learned (from an episode of the Boondocks) that Black folks love R Kelly...and don't care what he did...if the girl didn't want to be pissed on she would have moved out of the way. (think about it)
I've learned that no matter how much "they" claim to like/love you, your black ass had better be to work on time.
I've learned that if someone can't keep their own business to themselves, they DAMN sure can't keep your's.
I've learned that physical attractions can only go so far, eventually there has to be some substance there, (Or.... is freaky circus sex enough ??)
I've learned that the old "early bird catches the worm" thing...was a bunch of Bullshit, I need my sleep.
I've learned that it takes only 1 non-driving jackass to fonk uP traffic for 10,000 other people.
I've learned that the people you care about the most in life are taken from you too soon, and all the less important ones NEVER go away.
I've learned to appreciate my friends and family a lot more....our time together is short and not promised, we need to enjoy eachother.

Happy Friday bloggers !! What up Rob Mack ?? What up Blah Blah Blah ??